November 17, 2010

Chip-Resistant Corelle-ware

Ladies/Gentlemen:

I am writing you today as I nurse a wound on my right hand. You see, last night, I made the mistake of having one of your Correlle dinner plates slip from my grasp and fall 6 inches into my stainless steel sink, whereupon it shattered into what, by my count, seems to be a million pieces. Many of the pieces were quite visible, but it seems that many of them were not, and could only be detected when rubbing up against human skin and embedding itself in the epidermis, searching for (and finding) the nearest capillary to open.

Your plates are sold as 'break-resistant' and 'chip-proof'. They are quite visually attractive, and I have several sets. However, in the past year, this is the third occurrence upon which I have had the misfortune of cleaning up a shattered dinner plate.

I have, in the past, dropped a plate onto the kitchen floor (approximately 3"), which is surfaced with a double-thick linoleum with extra padding. I have dropped knives and glasses at this same height, and neither the surface nor the drink-ware suffered the same fate as my Corelle dinnerware.

It seems that in making your plates chip-proof, you have increased the likelihood that instead of merely chipping (providing an easy cleanup process of a few chips and a large plate), your product seeks to ensure there is little to no evidence, by exploding upon impact. While in the past, a few sweeps of a broom and a vacuum have been able to clean up the mess, it was all the more interesting last night, since I did not drop the plate onto the kitchen floor.

I dropped it (again, about 6-8 inches) into my stainless steel sink....with the garbage disposal.

Now, I don't know what you know about garbage disposals, but I will tell you that they are not made for rapid or simple disassembly. No, they are made for chopping and grinding and staying in place. And if you get something stuck in a disposal, it can be QUITE a chore to remove it as you shove your hand down the hole meant for water and waste and attempt to fish out what you've dropped. It's that, or call a rather expensive plumber.

So I was quite upset when, rather than having to fish out 2 or 3 chips from a cracked plate, I found myself fishing out slivers of Corelle dinner plate, sized anywhere between a vein-slicing 1/2" x 4" curved-blade piece to curse-inducing micrometer sized ceramic slivers.

Despite all the care in the world, I came away with wounds I didn't realize I had until they began bleeding.

Thankfully, I did not slice anything vital, and with the help of a very trustworthy Dyson I was able to clear out the disposal adequately once I had removed the larger slices.

However, I am not sure if you've changed the formula of your plates in the past year and a half, but this most recent batch seems VERY MUCH LESS 'break-resistant' than I was led to believe or have experienced in the past.

Although, I gotta hand it to you - they really are chip-resistant....they NEVER chip....ever...I wonder if you could also maybe make them 'EXPLOSION'-resistant?